I unsealed my eyes back to reality, looking up as Walt was getting dressed. The silence in the room was as thick as a southern grandma’s oatmeal. Walt turned adjusting his cufflinks to see me still on the bed, nude, Blaque still in my hand soaked with silver cream. Walter sat at the edge of the bed next to me, like a coach consoling one of his players after a loss. He rubbed my back to soothe me. Knowing he had disappointed me, Walter graced me with a quick, dry peck on the forehead while patting my stomach. He then smiled while caressing the side of my cheeks.
Minutes later Walter left with the jingle of his keys silenced from the shutting of the front door. As the afternoon sun shone through the second-floor window, I felt so cold… so unfulfilled, horny, and alone. I tried to revisit my fond memories of how Walter use to be without Blaque to help fill the void. I achieved the orgasm, but it was still hollow. I yearned for the real thing; I wanted for the real thing; I longed to feel Walter’s tight loving grip holding me as we both climaxed at the break of dawn. Blaque wasn’t enough.
“So how are things with you and Walter?” Madison asked as we shared a fruit platter at the Pallet Rouge.
“Fine, I guess…” I replied, shoving another piece of caramel dipped strawberry in my mouth.
“I don’t know girl; he seems so different now.”
“Humph! You know what that means right?” Madison perked up her ruby red full lips.
“Not really but I’m pretty sure you’re going to inform me anyway.”
“Come on Boo, he’s obviously found a new toy to play with. Humph wouldn’t be the first time, and for all we know, he could still be playing with an old one.”
“N-… I don’t think so, and he ended that.” It was a while back when I found texts from an unknown woman in Walter’s phone.
Headless images of a tattooed lady’s physique filled his inbox with messages of meets and gratified wild evenings. When I confronted him, he spared no words of telling the truth. Walter started picking at my flaws, running the whole “You’ve changed…” line. The day I left, was the same day I went to work at the diner and met him, Amir.
“Can’t see how you managed to stay with his crazy ass… shiiiiid I wish a man would put his hands on me and still be breathing.” Madison held her fork examining it. “Hey, have you ever thought about hurting Walt?”
“What woman hasn’t contemplated killing her abusive lover at one point or another? But I’m not the type to commit violence against someone.”
“Sounds like weakness if you ask me,” Madison stuck her fork into a melon plunging it in the caramel sauce. “But noooooo gurl, I mean emotionally? Have you ever thought about leaving his ass for someone way better?”
Faint echoes of the last night I spent with Amir flickered throughout my mind. A night with a man who loved every ounce of me, who wanted to save me. My stomach tightened and started to flip, I excused myself to the restroom to expel the fruit and caramel mixture. I sat in the bathroom shedding tears I thought I long finished shedding. The question of if I made the right decision still haunted me, and the truth is, I still don’t know the answer or if I ever will. Only time will tell the results of my choice, and I pray the outcome is a good one.
I returned to the table just in time to see Madison giving her number to some high yellow Drake looking brotha. It’s amazing how guys fall for those full red jeweled lips, large 36DD breast, and long black Remy hair. I bet most of them would flip if they ever found out Madison use to be a Mason.
“Another potential prospect?” I asked taking my seat; partaking of the fruits, this time without the sweet sauce.
“Something like that,” she winked sticking her tongue out. Madison and I enjoyed the rest of our lunch chatting more about the past, present, and things that may or may not ever come to fruition. After lunch, we spent a bit of time walking around the mall trying on clothes and shoes then chilled out the rest of the day at her crib watching movies.